Grimlock

Him No Bozo, Him King

Hasbro, Transformers Generations Toyline, 2006

Nope, you’re still not reading that wrong. And yep, we’re reviewing Grimlock again. This time, our leader of the Dinobots comes to us in the form of the Generations toyline which was a reimagining of the original line and characters, 25 years later.

I think this evaluation is important because it says a lot about toys have evolved in the last quarter-decade. If we look at the Transformers as they first arrived and what we have now, it speaks volumes about the fandom and the world said fandom inhabits.

Background

For 25 years, Hasbro has been producing Transformers toys. Believe it or not, there’s never been a point when Transformer toys haven’t been in production and available. Through the dark days of the Gen-two era, through the beacon that was Beast Wars and then to the nightmare that was Beast Machines, and into Robots in Disguise and the Unicon Trilogy, and finally to the arrival of the live-action movie, Transformers have remained a part of the fabric of entertainment.

As was en vogue at the time, it was a return to the 80s, with 80s shows, movies, and concepts rising to the forefront of entertainment. It was an era rife with relaunches and reimaginings. And Transformers was no different. And so we got the Generations toyline.　

Appearance – 4 out of 5

It’s not going to surprise anyone if I describe this toy is beautiful. It elegantly captures the original design and appearance of Grimlock – in both robot and dinosaur mode – and then him to the next level.

Construction – 2 out of 5

While there is nothing poor about this toy, it is a little lacking in the materials. The plastic feels a little light and there are some movements that require a bit of elbow grease which, with the light construction, can give one pause about doing possible damage. Also, some joints don’t really lock into place so it’s too easy for them to swing open with even the slightest movement.

Movement – 4 out of 5

Speaking of movement, this thing is a charm. Beautifully done, this figure is (already referenced above) incredibly poseable and comes with an array of joints that correspond with the anatomy. Both robot and dinosaur modes can move fluidly and naturally.

Extras – 3 out of 5

The toy comes with two extras: a tail/sword weapon of some bizarre design and a gun with a blade (which is absent from the photo above, sorry). Both of these fit into the character’s hands in robot mode and fit onto the figure in dinosaur mode.

Packaging – 4 out of 5

I know; I have a love affair with Hasbro and its Transformers packaging. And you know what, the Generation’s line didn’t let us down. Beautifully illustrated, this accentuated the newness of the toys’ designs while still harkening back to the original line.

　

Overall – 4 out of 5

This is a fun toy to play with that’s well-built and pretty sturdy. Combine with that its familiarity to the fans that have loved the franchise since the start and you’ve got a great toy. If there was any mistake to level against this toy, it should be obvious: it should be bigger. It’s Grimlock, afterall!

Grimlock

Him No Bozo, Him King

Hasbro, Transformers Toyline, 1984

No, you’re not reading this wrong. This isn’t a repeat of last week’s review; it’s an examination of a related toy. It would seem that in the closing months of the last year of the first decade of the new millennium, we’ve defined ourselves as a culture – at least from an entertainment standpoint – by how we’ve reimagined what we’ve enjoyed in the past. Last week’s entry was a discussion of a toy from a cartoon that was based partially off a movie a few years old and a cartoon series a few decades old (which the movie was ALSO based off). Dizzying, yes?

This isn’t to cast judgment on this phenomena. Personally speaking, I believe there have been some wonderful successes in this whole run of remakes and reimaginings. And while I won’t deny I grow weary of it, I also get super-psyched about some of the titles that are next up. Still, it’s fun to go back to the original inspirations and view them for what they are. In some ways, they don’t stand up to the test of time. And in some ways, they really do.

　

Background

I won’t rehash what we’ve already established about Grimlock as a character. He’s the leader of the Dinobots, which are giant robots that transform into dinosaurs. And that sentence is probably all you really need to know to establish this guy’s awesomeness. Oh, and he breathes fire.

Appearance – 3 out of 5

This is a pretty average toy. While this review is based off the Gen-2 line, it’s a near-carbon copy of the original Gen-1 line (the difference being the color – gun-metal gray traded for deep blue – and materials – die-cast metal traded for hard plastic). The character looks pleasantly similar to the character from the cartoon and is nicely proportioned. Screws and joints can be seen but they’re not garish and tend to be worked into the overall look and feel of the toy. There are some nice textures but nothing that truly stands out.

Construction – 2 out of 5

Once again, we have to confront an unpleasant truth about the Gen-1 Transformers toys which is that they were not the perfect toys overall. This toy is considerably top-heavy in robot mode and you find you have to extend his arms fully forward just to keep him from falling over. This lack of balance, coupled with some weak joints (principally the knees and the flaps of his dinosaur-mode torso), makes this toy a little unlikely to survive years and years of play.

Movement – 2 out of 5

Grimlock is deceptively disappointing when it comes to movement. At first, it appears like this toy has some pretty decent mobility. But upon inspection, most of the mobility is as much due to its transformation process as it is to simulate the movement in the robot mode. The hips and knees move only in line with their transformation process, the arms have no elbows, and there are no hip or neck rotators.

Fortunately, in Dinosaur mode, things improve. The tail doesn’t move and the head has a range of motion of maybe 15 degrees, but the legs (the arms in robot mode) sprout knee joints (that go both ways for some reason) that can simulate some varieties of walking and running.

Extras – 2 out of 5

Grimlock comes with two weapons: a gun and a sword. The weapons aren’t terribly well-made or uniquely designed which, when you consider that there’s nowhere for them to go when he’s in dinosaur mode, makes them feel sort of slapped onto the toy. The gun is pretty standard for Transformers (and most toys) of the era, but the sword is really kind of poor and is little more than a shard of plastic. Add these passingly adequate weapons to his lack of elbow or wrist joints and one almost asks ‘why bother’.

Packaging – 3 out of 5

Transformers packaging was the yardstick back in the day and many toy makers can (or at least should) still learn a lot from them. The ID card with a personal quote, character description, and stats was frickin’ brilliant. The beautiful artwork was just that; art. And the points that could (in theory) be redeemed to buy Reflector just added to the near-mythical nature of the packaging.

Overall – 3 out of 5

Like my Devastator review, I’m sure this will cause some controversy. Lord knows, I feel a little ashamed. But this toy, when viewed objectively, has its faults. Mostly in the form of its mobility, there’s a lot left wanting. My single biggest complaint might actually be a little surprising but it’s the lack of size. The Dinobots are supposed to be huge, even compared to the other giant robots they are surrounded by. And they turn into dinosaurs, with their leader being the king of the giants, the Tyrannosaur Rex. Grimlock doesn’t convey that sense of size here. True, most of the Transformers toys were originally fairly uniform in height, but I figure this should have been the first toy to break with that. Optimus Prime might be the beloved child of the Transformers franchise, but this is Grimlock we’re talking about here. This is the King. And the king should’ve been bigger, dammit.

Grimlock

Him No Bozo, Him King

Hasbro, Transformers Animated Toyline, 2007

In the wake of the live-action Transformers movie, Hasbro had a real problem. On the one hand, they had a very popular and very successful movie on their hands. On the other hand, they had a lot of jilted fans that were a little annoyed at the liberties taken with their favorite franchise. Never ones to look back, Hasbro launched their Transformers Animated line in conjunction with their new animated series that drew from every source prior as well as becoming its own entity. However, as has been stated before, Hasbro knows where its bread is buttered and they went to great lengths to make sure the fans didn’t feel left out on this one.

　

Background

Quick question: what’s more awesome than robots that turn into cars and planes? If you said robots that turn into dinosaurs, you’d be right. Such was the thinking when it came to the first sub-class of Transformers, the Dinobots. With a wide variety of origins ranging throughout the different variations of the story, everybody seems to have their own spin on the Dinobots. But one thing that is never questioned is who is in charge: Grimlock.

Grimlock, who transforms into a Tyrannosaurus Rex, is always the leader of the Dinobots and is often jockeying for leadership of the Autobots themselves, typically leading to friction and even out-right confrontation with Optimus Prime. While he is the brains (sometimes a dubious claim) of the Dinobot operation, he’s often the most physically powerful as well. This was beautifully illustrated in the Transformers Animated series.

Transformers Animated was a colorful and somewhat more kid-friendly version of the original series. The characters are a little bit more outlandish and extreme than their Gen-One counterparts, but they also benefited from superior character development. And while the plots of individual episodes tended to be a little less complex, the overarching season and series plots were the wonderful result of the anime invasion in the late 90s. As a result, Grimlock in Animated is like a caricature of his Gen-One self. However, like all good art, through this exaggeration we see even more clearly elements of the character we know and love.

Appearance – 4 out of 5

The Grimlock figure is very well made and beautifully represents the character from the show. And like the character from the show, it clearly harkens back to the original character from Gen-One, all the way down to the nigh-identical transformation sequence. The character is nicely colored and manages to capture the somewhat whimsical look of the character from the series. The only real complaint I have is that seams and screws are way too obvious. There’s pretty much no way for the character to stand that you don’t see at least a few reminders of how the toy was put together.

Construction – 3 out of 5

The figure is relatively solid in its construction and the plastic is a bit on the weighty side, though I wouldn’t bee too quick to apply the adjective ‘rugged’. All the joints are sturdy, but there’s still a certain sense of fragility to the figure that isn’t as common to Transformers as one would first suspect. It feels a little light in the hands and the limbs feel a little too disproportionate for their weight distribution. There’s no clear issue with the construction, but it’s just not quite there to make it solid and well done.

Movement – 5 out of 5

This figure is beautifully mobile. It’s got every joint you need and none of the ones you don’t. There isn’t a pose this figure can’t take. The head turns, the jaw of the T-Rex head opens and closes, the shoulders are ball-joints, there’s a waist, and more. The only thing it’s lacking are ankles and you really won’t miss them. Seriously, both forms are extremely mobile and natural to move. The toy even has opposable thumbs for crying out loud!

Extras – 2 out of 5

Grimlock comes with only one extra, but it’s a doozy. He comes with a flaming sword that (in theory) doubles as a gust of flames from his mouth. The sword is appropriately large for a thug like Grimlock and it even has little sprouting flames that pop out by putting it in his hand. In dinosaur form, the sword is supposed to stick into his mouth to simulate his fiery breath. The reality is not so cool as the sword barely fits in his mouth and when it does, it still looks like a sword stuck in his mouth. A for effort, but a D- for execution.

Packaging – 3 out of 5

The Transformers Animated packaging was quiet nice and bordered on excellent, but it just didn’t quite make it. Each package came with a picture of the figure on the front, a plastic window to see the figure inside, and an explanation of the character’s powers and personality on the back. Unfortunately, the explanation was a little sparse and there was no real explanation of the story itself. Other characters were presented, but they seemed haphazardly chosen and represented only a fraction of the available line. Overall, it was good packaging and well-done, but not anything to write home about.

　

Overall – 4 out of 5

This is a fine example of a very decent toy. While it’s definitely lacking in some notable areas, overall it’s still a well-made toy that’s a lot of fun to play with. The transformation movements are smooth and make sense, the figure is very easy to pose and will hold poses without much effort. I don’t think this is the most sterling example of a Four, but it’s simply too well made and too much fun to play with to reside with the mediocrity of a Three.

Rick Hunter's Veritech Fighter

Robotech’s Golden Boy Returns

Toynami, 2001

Transformable mecha have long been known for their poor transitions from show to toy. It’s often extremely hard to capture all the wonder and awesomeness that a mech in a show displays in a tangible little plastic man. The issues range from the technology to make a hardy enough material that will endure play while still being light enough to cheaply produce. You’ve also got the issue of joint mechanics, figuring out how to replicate the transformation sequence in a believable manner and, oh yeah, it’d be nice if it actually looked like the character itself.

One solution that some toy companies pursued was to simply do away with the transformable feature. If you focused on one form rather than combining both, then you could focus on a single toy (a human-shaped figure for example) and employ every trick in the book to make that toy frickin’ awesome. Such as what Toynami did with their 2001 outing into the Robotech universe.

Background

Toynami remains a relative newcomer to the toy scene. Most people know of it’s (relative) meteoric rise to indie stardom in the wake of the dot com revolution in the 90s and early 2000s. A lot of toy companies cropped up during that time because, with the advent of Internet marketing, they could market worldwide without having to get shelf space in brick-and-mortar toy stores. This meant they could avail themselves of a wider consumer base while at the same appealing to niche markets.

The Robotech fandom is one such niche market. While Robotech may be one of the more famous shows from the 80s anime invasion, it still has mostly faded from the cultural consciousness (unlike Transformers, GI Joe, or Voltron). But there are still die-hard Robotech fans out there and they clamber for solid Robotech toys so hey can recreate the action from the show about earth’s invasion by giant aliens. And so, in the first years of the new millennium, companies like Toynami delivered the answer to so many fanboy prayers.

Appearance – 4 out of 5

Dynamic poses are often a bit difficult to strike for many action figures, but especially so for mecha toys. But one of the benefits of this figure is that pretty much every pose is dynamic. There’s almost no way it can’t not look awesome, like it’s in the middle of some high-risk action shot. This is partially due to the wide stance of the legs, but whatever. The toy looks awesome.

Construction – 3 out of 5

This figure balances some really great features with some really disappointing ones. The toy is, overall, made from some pretty good plastic. The individual limbs and body have some nice weight to them, but still feel light. The problem is the joints don’t feel particularly sturdy and it seems like it’s only a matter of time before playing with the toy wears them out. Also, the same complaint I had with the Alpha toy from a few months back is here with the hands. The toy comes with a variety of hands, all of which have to be yanked out of the joint. A broken hand that can no longer be traded out are all but inevitable.

Movement – 4 out of 5

The Veritech has a lot of linear joints that add to up to a whole lot of movement. In fact, the only problem this toy has joint-wise is that the hip joints are linear but with the wide stance, it makes some poses (especially less dramatic poses) inaccessible. It should be noted – and commended – that the feet, knee, and hip joints all work very well together despite the hips being at such an odd angle. That being said, having waist and neck joints, and shoulder/arm/elbow joints that petty much guarantee unlimited arm movement, this toy is a lot of fun to pose again and again.

Extras – 2 out of 5

Again, like the Alpha review from earlier, this toy comes with a series of hands and a single gunpod. There’re are no additional elements such as missiles or the famous battloid armor from the series (or even the Super Veritech equipment). This lack of materials is disappointing because of all the possibilities the Robotech universe offers.

Packaging – 2 out of 5

The packaging for this toy was pretty unremarkable. It was pleasantly vivid in its overall color, but there was absolutely no explanation as to what the ship was, who Rick Hunter was, what Robotech was about, anything.

Overall – 3 out of 5

This toy is very firmly a Three. It wouldn’t have taken much to push this over into the Four range, but in the same vein, it wouldn’t have taken much to knock it down to a Two. It could easily have gone either way. As it is, this is a pretty fun toy that is clearly aimed at fans and collectors and will be a solid addition to their collections. Just don’t plan on it being the centerpiece.

Battle Beasts

Wood, Fire, Water, and FUN

Hasbro and Takara Battle Beasts Line, 1986

　

If Hasbro is a family, with Transformers and GI Joe being the eldest siblings, and My Little Pony being the little sister, the Battle Beasts are the cousin who died tragically in a car accident last Labor Day weekend.

Toy companies are always trying to come up with something neat, innovative, and engaging to the ever-changing audience. But one thing that rarely changes is the assumption that you get one toy per package. Oh, sure, occasionally you’ll get a two-pack deal as part of a special promotion. But in general, one package, one toy. That’s the way it works, right?

Well, in 1984, Hasbro challenged this notion with the rarely remembered, but fondly recalled Battle Beasts. These simple thumb-sized toys came in packs of two, ensuring that right from the get-go, there was gonna be a pint-sized war.

　

Background

In the Land of the Rising Sun, from where the Battle Beasts hail, they are actually part of the Transformers series (called the Beast Formers, in no way related to the Beast Wars series…that we know of). But like most awesome toys in Japan, Hasbro came along and got the rights to distribute it worldwide. After what must have been whole minutes of brainstorming, the powers-that-be at Hasbro apparently decided that they didn’t want to ensure a guaranteed hit by tying the Battle Beasts in with the Transformers and launched them as their own line. The Battle Beasts did quite well for a bit, but like many of the 80s toy lines, it died a quiet death.

The Battle Beasts were plentiful in design and style, but they all were anthropomorphic animals in battle armor. Many had a hand replaced with a weapon (as evidenced by our little rhino guy who has a mace for a hand) and the others came with little weapons that were all too easy to lose (as evidenced by their absence from the picture). Each figure also had a heat-sensitive logo that revealed what element they belonged to (think of Battle Beasts as a big game of Paper-Rock-Scissors; Fire beats Wood, Wood beats Water, Water beats Fire). Which characters had which element though was random, so it was possible to have the same figure three times, each with a different element. This led to some weird combinations, such as a shark with the Wood element, but whatever.

Battle Beasts’ big selling aspect, though, was that they came in pairs. Right from the start, you were good to go (unless by sheer happenstance you happened to get two warriors of the same element). While there were vehicles and bases (which I never owned, but DESPERATELY wanted…thanks for nothing, Santa), Battle Beasts are mostly known for the paired packaging that made play immediate with a single purchase.

　

Appearance – 3 out of 5

These little guys are surprisingly detailed for being an inch and a half tall. Pretty much everything except the soles of their feet have texture and most characters are painted with three or four colors. The armor designs are pretty generic, but are all stylistically similar and include little notches, spikes, tubes, or other features to encourage imaginative interpretations of their powers.

Construction – 4 out of 5

These little guys are tough. They’re made out of single plastic, so they’re quite sturdy. The plastic is just soft enough that you don’t have to worry about puncturing skin if you step on one with your bare feet, but don’t expect these things to get crushed in the process. They’re quite hardy and very resilient.

Movement – 1 out of 5

For as great as these little toys are, they can’t move worth a damn. All figures have two joints: linear shoulder joints. Heads can turn, legs can’t bend, nothing.

Extras – 2 out of 5

Judging the extras is a wee bit picky because some figures came with a weapon and some didn’t. Those that did not usually came with a weapon equipped (like a drill instead of a left hand). The weapons were usually single pieces of plastic of one color, so they weren’t anything to write home about.

Packaging – 2 out of 5

The Battle Beasts’ packaging was pretty generic. It had a hand-drawn image of the war between two unidentified factions, and a plastic cover showing the two beasts in the package. On the back was an extremely rudimentary explanation of the basic setting, but most of the space was given up to explaining the color-changing decals. There was no real explanation for the plot, why the factions were fighting, or exactly how the factions formed. Or how the decals played into the fight. For example, how did my Lion being a Water element somehow trump my rhino who is a Fire element? Do the decals imbue magical powers? It’s unanswered.

　

Overall – 3 out of 5

Where these any other toys, they probably would have gotten a Two. But the Battle Beasts’ ruggedness, when coupled with their size, makes them too ideal. Yeah, they can’t move, but they’re the size of your thumb! Plus, the color-changing decals made the little figures into an advanced form of Paper-Rock-Scissors, which I believe was a precursor to so many of the toy/video game/collectible combat games that are all the rage now.

Megatron

Namesake of a Pistol

Hasbro Transformers Generation Two, 1992

Whether it’s toys or the mecha genre, Hasbro’s Transformers hold a hallowed place in the hearts and minds of all. But where there is love there is also heated controversy stemming from the slightest deviation of the established and accepted norm. And nowhere is this more evident than in the vehicle modes of the beloved Transformers. Consider for a moment the ardent debates about Optimus Prime in the 2007 live-action movie. All other aspects of the debate aside, many griped and complained that he went from a flat-nosed truck to an extended-cab truck. He didn’t even change vehicle types and people still got pissy.

The origins of this debate could arguably date back to the Transformer’s line rebirth in the early 90s with the Generation Two series. While Gen-2 saw many of the original toys refurbished and repackaged, others were recreated, including Optimus’ nemesis, the leader of the Decepticons, Megatron.

　

Background

When the original Transformers series ended in 1989, it left a vacuum in the hearts and minds of fans everywhere. The toys managed to endure for sometime after, but without the animated series to promote them, they quickly became more of a novelty than anything else. That changed in 1992 when Hasbro relaunched the Transformers line as Transformers Generation Two. While most of the toys remained unchanged despite some slight cosmetic alterations, one toy was radically re-imagined: the leader of the Decepticons, Megatron.

Megatron originally transformed into a Walther P-38 pistol that was so accurate in its detail, urban legends sprung up about Megatron toys being used in an assortment of crimes (the validity of these stories always remaining highly suspect). While this is often pointed to as the reason for Megatron’s reimaging as a tank, there are other equally if not more believable explanations. Megatron’s transformation sequence from giant robot to robot-sized pistol challenged the suspension of disbelief for many fans…fans of a show about alien robots that transform into earth vehicles. When the series would be translated into the live-action movies, this issue would be revisited with the writers of the movies stating ‘Megatron turning into a pistol would be sort of like Darth Vader turning into a lightsaber and having some else wield him’. And while the thought of a Darth-Vader-lightsaber wielded by Boba Fett is certainly compelling, the argument still stands.

Whatever the motivation, the solution was to have Megatron transform not into a pistol but into a big honking tank, complete with firing cannon. This actually silenced some complaints about Megatron’s new form because in the end, going from a pistol to a tank is kind of an upgrade.

Appearance – 3 out of 5

It’s a little tricky judging this toy’s appearance because of it’s not clear what to judge its appearance against. If we compare it to the original Gen-1 Megatron, then it fails to look as realistic, but it succeeds in looking more like the Megatron from the animated series. Seriously, check out the face and body of the original Megatron toy and you’ll see it looked nothing like Megatron from the series. As this is a tank – and a kind of neon camouflage tank at that – this Megatron toy doesn’t look like he did in the series. However the face is not only dead-on but it actually captures the overall identity of the character from the animated series. Likewise, when compared to other toys in the line, the physical size of this toy definitely helps to lend some credence and credibility to the role Megatron plays in the narrative (IE being a source of fear).

Representing the animated series’ character aside, this is a solid mid-range toy when it comes to appearance. There are lots of tactile details, but most of them are a bit weak in their overall execution. This is by no means a model of a tank, but it does fit in with the way the Transformers were/are generally depicted.

Construction – 2 out of 5

The Generation 2 toys were a bit of a sad time in toys because it really marked a turning point in the Transformers line because fewer and fewer of their figures were being made out of the beloved die-cast metal. Worse, the plastic that was being used had a tendency to be a little on the light side. Megatron is no exception and while the toy is not outstandingly weak or found lacking, it is a bit noticeable how light the arms, legs, and the toy overall is when held in the hand. It’s not bad, but it certainly could be a lot better.

Movement – 2 out of 5

The figure’s movements are pretty limited to linear shoulder rotation and elbow joints (not including the wheels meant to simulate the tank treads). There are knees and a waist, but their movements are more connected to the transformation sequence. The head doesn’t rotate, which is a shame. The gun does elevate partially, but that’s about it.

Extras – 3 out of 5

I can’t decide if it is disappointing or expected that Megatron would come with so few extra components. The Transformers line(s), for all their strengths, have never really been one for extras. Megatron comes with a pistol (that doubles as an anti-personnel rifle in tank mode) and six missiles that the cannon can fire in either mode. Only four rounds can be loaded at a time, but there is storage for the extra rounds in Megatron’s legs.

What few extras it has, I think this toy does a very good job. Everything can be used and utilized in every mode and everything the toy comes with can be contained in the toy itself. It’s this trait that I really wish we’d see more of. Likewise, the use of electronic sound effects (cocking the gun and firing the gun – which is two separate motions, which I must highlight as being awesome – raising the left arm for laser-firing sounds, and an ‘I am Megatron’ voice effect when the head is pressed down) is effective (though the voice doesn’t even remotely sound like Frank Welker) but not overbearing. I think this section might have ranked higher if it had just worked with a few more extras.

Packaging – 4 out of 5

Hasbro knows packaging, there’s no doubt. The Generation 2 toyline looked cool and the packaging used a lot of the classic toy designs along with new approaches to packaging. There is a bio card with a personal quote, character stats, and a general overview of who the character is. Likewise, there are Transformer points (that unfortunately never ended up being used, unlike the original line where Reflector could be ‘bought’ using the points) and a review of the story and the character.

Overall – 3 out of 5

This kind of toy is one of the hardest to rate because it falls so squarely between a Three and a Four. If they’d done just a wee bit more with the toy or had done things just a wee bit better, this would be a fantastic toy that every kid, collector, and fan would love to have. As it is, just one too many elements come in just under expectations, leaving this version of Megatron on the upper end of the mediocre side of things.

Ultraman

Disappointing A Loyal Fandom

Tsuburaya and Bandai, 1990

Recently, I’ve gotten some correspondence from people regarding my grading methods as well as my selection of toys, both of which seem to be a source of some confusion and/or consternation. That’s an issue for another posting, but I wanted to mention it here to help explain why this particular toy was chosen.

To start off, I love Ultraman. I’m kind of a nerd for the big rubber suit monster movies like Godzilla and others, so it was only natural that I would be a HUGE fan of the Ultraman: Towards The Future series in the 90s. The series ended too quickly for my tastes and the lack of a DVD release is a shame. But there were some toys and they were, in a word, awful.

Background

Ultraman is the Dr. Who to Godzilla’s Star Trek. Back before computer graphics could make a giant monster out of thin air, the only way to make such monsters was to build a miniature of a city and then have a guy in a big rubber suit smash it to bits. Hence the genre of Daidocugi movies, or ‘big rubber monsters’ movies. After Godzilla hit it big, a host of imitators and innovators appeared, including Ultraman (created by the same company as Godzilla).

The plot of Ultraman varies from series to series, but it generally involves Ultraman, the benevolent alien from Out There, bonding with an equally altruistic human in order to defend the earth against a weekly onslaught of giant monsters. The series that inspired this toy however broke from tradition and was set not only somewhere other than Japan, but starred a mostly non-Asian crew. Ultraman: Towards The Future (or Ultraman the Great for some audiences) was filmed in Australia and contained a pretty diverse cast who belonged to the Universal Multipurpose Agency (or UMA). They dealt with a variety of problems that always ended up with their maverick agent, Jack Shindo, calling upon Ultraman to fight a giant monster.

Ultraman: Towards The Future lasted one season in the United States, but legends abound of a second season that was filmed but never released. The season itself was divided with the first half of episodes following what was known as the Gudis story arc (Gudis being the over-arching bad guy) and then a series of misadventures with a different monster/threat each week. The toys to support the series appeared quietly and disappeared about as quickly, possibly due to their overall substandard nature. There were five toys (four monsters and Ultraman) along with two vehicles (for the UMA agents) and a playset. The vehicles were, by and large, leaps and bounds superior in their construction…or at least appeared to be on the back of the packaging because so few people ever found them to buy them.

Appearance – 2 out of 5

The Ultraman figure looks good and is a dead ringer for the character from the show. They do a pretty decent job of matching the colors and getting his overall proportions correct (action figures are notorious for beefing up their heroes), making him look fit and strong but not turning him into a muscle-bound he-man. The Jack Shindo figure that comes with Ultraman is generic at best, with almost no remarkable features. The only outstanding praise is to the weapon Jack Shindo carries being quite impressively molded to look like the weapons from the show. Otherwise there’s nothing outstanding about either character’s appearance.

Construction – 1 out of 5

The figure isn’t particularly rugged or heavy and the plastic that it is made out of is a bit on the sturdy side, but not remarkably so. Imagine the arms from the He-Man figures, only if they were hollow, and if they were the entire figure. The figure is about as heavy and feels about as sturdy as a bottle of aspirin.

Movement – 1 out of 5

The damn thing can barely move! It has two linear shoulder joints and a linear neck joint and that’s it. Yes, TECHNICALLY, is has hip joints, but about the only thing they’re useful for is changing his stance from a martial arts horse stance to doing the cha-cha. And his waist joint, assuming that’s supposed to be a joint, can’t rotate at all. I’m not kidding when I describe this thing as a semi-poseable statue. The Jack Shindo figure has linear shoulder, hip, and neck joints, giving it pretty rudimentary movements. But that means that the little toy accessory is more mobile than the main toy itself!

Extras – 2 out of 5

I will give the toy some credit that it comes with the Jack Shindo figure, which is superior in just about every fashion. Ultraman doesn’t have any tools or weapons, so it makes sense he wouldn’t come with such, so they had to do something. Unfortunately, their plan to ‘do something’ was to upstage their own figure.

Packaging – 3 out of 5

The packaging for the figure was possibly the best part. There was an exceptionally generic explanation of who and what Ultraman was (that read like it was ripped off from a Voltron toy) and a list of every toy in the line, basically giving you the entire catalog in one go. The packaging was brightly colored and it showed you the toy inside through a plastic window.

Overall – 1 out of 5

Normally toys of this ilk (ie semi-posable statues) are not something I review. But I wanted to do so now to illustrate just what ranks as a One in my book. And as much as I love the Ultraman Franchise, and the Towards the Future series that inspired this toy, it doesn’t change the fact that this figure is so disappointing, it barely counts as a toy at all.

Inferno Fury

Xevoz: STIKFAS on Steroids

Xevoz Line, Hasbro, 2004

After the sheer disappointment of last week’s toy, I wanted to follow this week with one of the best toys in the last decade. Sadly, the Xevoz line turned out to be none too popular, which is a real shame. These were absolutely wonderful figures with incredible possibility, great accessories, a hearty sturdiness, and a nearly limitless possibility for expansion. Seriously, these toys should have been the next big thing because all the key ingredients for success were there.

Background

STIKFAS are the great secret of toy aficionados. The toys appeared very quietly and with limited release back around 2002, largely through the Internet and similar bizarre outlets. They saw little if any widespread availability. But Hasbro, being the ever-vigilant opportunists, took the STIKFAS toys and created a toyline around them, calling them the Xevoz line. What made the STIKFAS figures so appealing was that all joints were ball joints and they came with an array of generic parts, leading to nearly limitless possibilities when it came to posing and customization. The Xevoz would take this idea and jazz it up, but keep the core concepts.

There were a handful of different Xevoz toys, all of which were bizarre sci-fi concepts taken to a colorful extreme. Just about every part was interchangeable and the figures themselves were extremely study and yet maneuverable. There were different times (like the humans, the metahumans, the elementals, etc) as well as an online game component. There was even a dice-like game that could be played to simulate battle. Load the triangular extensions into the hexagon tops and roll it like a die. The bar that came up told you what damage you take, or what damage you did. It wasn’t a simple game, but if you got the hang of it, it added a whole new element of play to the figures.

Appearance – 5 out of 5

There’s no two ways about it; this thing looks frickin’ cool. The toy does a beautiful job of capturing the image of molten rock, flowing lava, and flickering flames all in one go. The transparent pieces are pretty uniform an nicely colored, making the toy almost look hot to the touch. The sheer number of joints as well as all the pieces gives this toy an almost infinite number of looks, from the demonic monster to the hallowed angel of the elements, and everything in between.

Construction – 5 out of 5

Hand in hand with the toy’s appearance is how well it’s constructed. Even though this particular toy is transparent, it’s still exceptionally sturdy and well-made. Each individual piece feels rugged and so strong, it feels like it would take a hammer blow to damage it.

Movement – 5 out of 5

I gave serious consideration to giving this a Six because of just how obscenely mobile this toy is. It can take any pose the human body is capable of, and then so many more. The plethora of joints (18 on the figure as shown), all of which are ball joints ensure that it’s extremely flexible and has mobility to spare.

Extras – 4 out of 5

The toy comes with numerous bonus features, including a spring-fired weapon, a sword and a staff, griping hands, and three different heads, all on top of the dice-like rolling game that each figure comes with. The only thing that keeps this toy from ranking higher is that there’s no arrangement of pieces that keeps them all on the figure: there are just too many. And without some kind of rack to put them on, keeping track of them can be a bit problematic.

Packaging – 2 out of 5

For all of the Xevoz line’s strengths, it’s packaging was definitely lacking. While it was striking and colorful, it wasn’t terribly memorable. There was an illustration of the figure on the front and a basic rundown of their personality and characteristics on the back. However, there was no real explanation as to any kind of narrative – even a basic one (hell, even Chutes and Ladders has a plot). There was also what appeared to be a haphazard collection of three other Xevoz shown, meant to tantalize the buyer, but it ended up just confusing at least this buyer because it was unclear just how many factions were represented in the line.

　

Overall – 5 out of 5

This is an unbelievably awesome toy! Seriously, minor packaging gripes aside, the only other problem was there were too many accessories to fit on the figure. That’s the best problem in the world for an action figure to have! Between the ruggedness, awesome look, customizability of the figures because of the different parts, interchangeability of said parts between different figures, and the rolling dice game element, and this was a toy line that by all rights should have taken the world by storm. It’s a mystery to me why the Xevoz line isn’t around to this day because I’d be the first one in line to buy every single friggin’ figure.

Super Zeo Megazord

Power Rangers 2.1
Power Rangers Zeo, Bandai, 1996

　

I wanted to follow-up last week’s review with one in a similar vein. I think the Power Ranger toys deserve some serious scrutiny because they were quietly some of the best toys on the market for quite a long time. The figures and other accessories were noticeably lacking (to be reviewed at a later date), but the mecha really were some of the best toys we had to play with in the late 90s.

Unfortunately, there were a lot of missed opportunities that it seems like a little forethought could have helped to realize. Last week, I reviewed the Shogun Ultrazord and talked pretty extensively about how it benefited from using figures from previous lines (specifically Titanus from the original Dino Zord line and the Falcon Zord from the Ninja Zord line). Today, we’re going to go in the opposite direction and look at one of the most disappointing of the toys, the Super Zeo Megazord.

Background

For the first three seasons of the Power Rangers, you had (mostly) the same cast and the same costumes. As zords came and went, you still had the same team of Rangers. But at the close of the third season, with the Shogun Zords in play, there was a protracted story arc about the destruction of the Rangers’ Dino Zord coins (the source of their powers) and a general disability to continue to protect the earth. What followed was an admirable quest to uncover a new source of power: the Zeo Crystals.

The Zeo Crystals gave birth to a new set of Ranger powers, costumes, etc, and marked the first real transition for the show. Power Rangers Zeo would eventually transition to Power Rangers Turbo (kicked off by a god-awful movie), which would likewise transition to Power Rangers in Space. PRiS would mark the end of the six-season Zordon Saga and from there on, each season would have new Rangers, new mecha, and generally be their own self-contained stories with little connection to the previous series.

Anyway, back to Power Rangers Zeo, the Zeo Rangers would end up getting a second set of mecha called the Super Zeo Zords. In the show, these kicked ass and took names, but the toys really fell short. While the individual Super Zeo Zords are all that bad, the combined form of the Super Zeo Megazord is really kind of lacking. This is especially true when you realize that the Super Zeo Megazord couldn’t utilize the other toys in the Zeo Rangers toy line. The Super Zeo Megazord couldn’t combine or meaningfully connect with the Zeo Megazord or the Red Zeo Megazord (a self-contained giant mech specifically piloted by the Red Ranger), and pretty weakly combined with Pyramidus, the Zeo Ranger’s version of Titanus. This would be the straw that broke the camel’s back for many Power Rangers fans who were fed up with having an increasing number of toys that couldn’t connect/combine to one another.

　

Appearance – 2 out of 5

I don’t want to say the Super Zeo Megazord is ‘phoning it in’, but I will say that it seemed to be the start of a disappointing in the Power Rangers toys of being a little cheaper and lower quality than previous iterations. The Super Zeo Megazord looks good and looks like the mech from the show, but it just doesn’t really stand out. The joints are painfully obvious, as are the bolts and seams that put the toy together. It’s not all that bad looking of toy; it’s just with the standard set by the previous Megazords, it really pales in comparison. However, it’s worth pointing out that while the Super Zeo Megazord looks like the mech from the show, the individual mecha (Super Zeo Zords I through V) do not. The figures only casually look like the figures from the show. Some are so grossly disproportionate and out of balance, it’s almost laughable (I’m looking at you Super Zeo Zord IV).

Construction – 3 out of 5

The toy itself is decent if unremarkable in its construction. The plastic is fairly hefty and the joints are quite solid, but there’s not a lot to write home about.

Movement – 2 out of 5

Sort of like last week’s Shogun Ultrazord, the Super Zeo Megazord is really lacking when it comes to movement. The arms, shoulders, and elbows have simple joints that add up to some pretty decent arm mobility. Sadly, the head and legs are stuck in one position. The individual mecha/zords who make up the Super Zeo Megazord are pretty equal in there subparness in that they have simple shoulder and knee joints, no hip joints to speak of, stubby little arms that can barely reach past their chest plates, and none can turn their heads (with the exception of Super Zeo Zord V and that’s directly related to its transformation).

Extras – 1 out of 5

It’s pretty disappointing that this figure only comes with two identical swords that are pretty flimsy (although not quite as flimsy as the Shogun Megazord’s sword) and made of one piece of plastic that’s all one color. It’s makes you wonder why they even bothered at all. The swords can only be held by the Super Zeo Megazord and not any of the individual zords. Moreover, none of the individual zords come with their own weapons or equipment or even the capacity to hold such equipment if they did come with it.

Packaging – 2 out of 5

By the time Power Rangers Zeo had started, the packaging was beginning to take the backseat. In this case, the packaging offered little information about the mecha itself, or really anything other than the absolute most basic and generic of plot descriptions. The packaging looked nice, but offered little information about the toy, the toyline, or the franchise to which it belonged.

　

Overall – 2 out of 5

This toy is pretty disappointing. The Power Rangers toys have been a staple of the action figure section for closing in on two decades now, and you’d think they’d have learned how to do them right. Sadly, with examples like the Super Zeo Megazord, it’s understandable while so few people take the line seriously. Most everything about the figure appears to have been half-assed, which is disappointing considering the lineage to which it belongs to. This toy could have, and should have, been a lot better and it’s a shame it wasn’t.

Shogun UltraZord

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers 1.4

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Bandai, 1995

When you talk about long-running sci-fi shows, everybody mentions Star Trek, Dr Who, X-Files, and others. But one show that many people neglect is not just one of the longest-running sci-fi shows but one of the longest running television shows with a total of sixteen seasons that ran back-to-back. The show? Power Rangers.

Oh, true, most of the seasons were only tenuously linked, with the primary story arc ending with Power Rangers in Space. But sixteen seasons is not a trivial accomplishment, especially for a sci-fi show and doubly-especially for a kid’s show. Power Rangers has survived with the best of them and become the brand most synonymous with the genre. With the arguable exception of Voltron, Power Rangers is the face of teen-team-mecha shows and its legacy is proving to be quite enduring.

Background

To understand this toy, you need to understand the nature of the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. Not in the sense of it being about a group of teens with attitude, or that its got way more spandex than it should. What needs to be understood is the hierarchy of mecha in the show. You’ve got the individual mecha (called ‘Zords’), piloted by each Power Ranger. The (usually) five combine to form the Megazord. The Megazord combines with the Sixth Ranger’s Zord and the rarely-seen Seventh Zord (who pretty much never has a Ranger) to form the Ultrazord. The Ultrazord is the veritable big gun in the Power Rangers’ arsenal. In the case of the Shogun Ultrazord, you have the combination of the Shogun Megazord (made up of the individual Shogun Zords), the White Falcon Zord (actually a holdover from the earlier team of Zords, the Ninja Zords), and Titanus (a holdover from the first team of Zords, the Dino Zords).

It’s those last two Zords that are important with this toy because this was a rare glimpse at something the mecha show/toy field needs to embrace; interchangeability. Within the Power Ranger shows/toy lines, it wasn’t unusual at all to have various combinations of Zords. In the original Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (MMPR), the Dino Zords combined to form the Megazord, or could combine with the Dragonzord to form the Dragonzord Battlemode. The Dragonzord could also combine with the Megazord to give you the Mega Dragonzord. And then Titanus entered into the picture and, well, yeah. But once the Thunderzords entered into the picture (the replacements for the Dinozords and the precursor to the Ninja Zords), all your Dinozords were effectively useless. Narratively, this was explained with the destruction of the Dinozords, but from a toy standpoint, this kind of sucked.

The same thing occurred when the Thunderzords were replaced with the Ninja Zords. They all just kind of went away. But when the Ninja Zords were replaced by the Shogun Zords, the White Falcon Zord stuck around. Moreover, with both the Ninja Zords and the Shogun Zords, Titanus (who hadn’t been destroyed with the Dino Zords) returned to complete the Ultrazord forms.

Logistically, many of these problems trace back to either the narrative or, more often, the fact that MMPR was a single show while the Japanese footage (which was almost all the mecha footage) was derived from different and generally unrelated shows. But it still leaves behind this brief period were toys from one line (MMPR in the case of Titanus and the Ninja Zords in the case of the Falcon Zord) were useable in the current line (the Shogun Zords). It would have been beyond words to express how unbelievably awesome it would be if every new mecha line could combine with the previous line…or all the previous lines. Imagine if the Dinozords and the Thunderzords could combine into one big-ass fourteen-mech behemoth. Hell, chase the dream and imagine if EVERY Power Ranger toy line could combine. With at least a minimum of six zords per line and sixteen seasons, you’d be looking at a mech composed of no less than NINETY-SIX robots. Just gazing upon that thing’s majesty could single-handedly bring about world peace. I understand that no toy engineer in their right mind would want to design it, and narratively explaining that would be a nightmare beyond words. And that doesn’t even address the fact that the toy probably couldn’t actually even move. But still! That thing would be the very face of toy heaven. Power Rangers skirted with this idea ever-so-brief with the Shogun Ultrazord and hopefully, it’s an idea that will return in order to realize the dream.

　

Appearance – 4 out of 5

The Power Ranger toys aren’t without their problems, but one area they never fail to excel at is their appearance. The toys just LOOK cool and the mecha is the belle of the ball. The Shogun Ultrazord is visually imposing and it has the perfect amount of detail to keep the eye engaged without looking too busy. The toy looks shot-for-shot like the figure in the show, which is surprisingly hard to find in mecha toy lines.

Breaking down the toy a bit, the individual parts look just as good. The Shogun Megazord, the Shogun Zords, the White Falcon Zord, Titanus, they all look every bit the part of their show’s counterparts.

Construction – 3 out of 5

This toy is pretty well put-together and is relatively solid. Unfortunately, one of the principal elements that I praise is also one of its major flaws. The quality of Titanus’ construction is noticeably higher than that of the Falcon Zord, and both are better put together and more solid than the Shogun Megazord. Even still, individual elements of each toy are disappointing. Titanus’ body and neck are beautifully constructed and very sturdy, while the legs and guns/tail are almost laughable. The Shogun Zords are right on the cusp of feeling cheap with their hollow torsos and arms, being saved almost solely by the texture and detail found on each figure. The Falcon Zord is the only element that is consistent in its quality, and even then it’s only above-average.

Movement – 2 out of 5

And this is where the figure really shows its weakness. Combiner mecha traditionally aren’t the most mobile of toys, but this one is really pushing the boundaries between being a toy and simply a statue. The individual Shogun Zords have relatively mobile shoulder joints and the Yellow, Black, and Red Shogun Zords also have rotating arms, but that’s it (and that’s as much connected to the transformation sequence as anything else). The Shogun Megazord has no moving parts aside from the strict rotation of the shoulders. Titanus has no movements beyond those connected to the battery-powered forward-only locomotion. The Falcon Zord has shoulder joints for the wings, a neck and beak joint (it’s opening mouth is actually kind of cool), hip joints, and claw joints. Unfortunately, none of this is particularly impressive or does much to make the Falcon Zord memorably articulate. As for the Shogun Ultrazord, forget about it. Shogun Megazord’s arms go up and down and Titanus can roll forward. That’s it. While this is in keeping with the concept from the show (as that’s about all it), it’s still abysmally low.

Extras – 2 out of 5

Scoring the extras was a little hard because this toy had some great extras…they just weren’t very well made. Each Shogun Zord came with a little weapon that, when combined, became a shield and staff weapon for the Shogun Megazord. It was a cool idea, except the execution was a bit week. All the weapons are a bit flimsy and only the shield has any coloring other than the same generic red. The Shogun Megazord also came with a pretty awesome sword…except it’s almost too flimsy to stay straight. Titanus came with a handful of additional parts, but none of which are of note but most of which had a place to be put on Titanus (with the exception of a pair of sleds used to pull the Dinozord Megazord in Tank mode). The Falcon Zord came with no bonus features.

Packaging – 3 out of 5

Yet again, the different toys have different packaging styles, making this a bit tricky to score. All three toys came in packages that clearly explained the basic story and the individual mechs to the uninitiated. Only Titanus came with anything extra, though, namely a small card that could be cut out that matched the cards from the other toys in the original MMPR Dinozords line (a trend discontinued by the time the Falcon Zord and the Shogun Megazord arrived on the scene).

　

Overall – 3 out of 5

I felt a little let down when tallying up the scores with this toy because I was certain it would rank higher. I really want to give it a Four, but the truth is that no matter how awesome a concept, if it doesn’t execute well, it’s largely for naught. And that was the case with the Shogun UltraZord. The Shogun Megazord’s…average and Titanus and the Falcon Zord aren’t that much better. Ultimately, it really was the lack of movement and mobility that killed this toy. Conceptually, it should have scored much higher. But then, maybe that’s not too off-the-mark. For a lot of people, the Power Rangers have long been a legacy of almosts and could’ve-beens. But this toy is fun to play with and has a lot of elements that, were they to be realized more successfully, would have made it legendary in its awesomeness. Maybe next time around.

Omega Supreme

The Big Boy Returns

Hasbro Transformers Cybertron Line, 2003

When you talk about the Transformers, there are a few big players that need to be mentioned. Not big in the popular sense like Optimus Prime or Starscream, but big in a more literal sense. Some of the Transformers are physically gigantic. Some of the names that would come along include the walking cities of Fortress Maximus, Triptycon, Scorpinok, and Metroplex. And then of course, there's the planet-god Unicron. But if you go back to the beginning, there was one name that appeared before all the others. The original 'Big Kid On The Block', whose name struck fear in all Decepticons; Omega Supreme.

Background

Omega Supreme occupies an interesting place in the Transfomers mythos because he's often depicted as a victim of the war between the Autobots and the Decepticons. In the original series, he was a semi-derranged psychopath hell-bent on revenge. Even dressed up to be safe for US cartoons, it doesn't take a lot to realize that this Autobot suffered from a variety of mental illness as a result of the war with the Decepticons. Remember, he ATTACKED Optimus Prime in order to get as his percieved enemy. Prime managed to talk him down, but he was prepared to let San Franciso be destroyed just so he could get as his sworn enemies, the Constructicons. Even in the most recent incarnation of the show, Transformers Animated, Omega Supreme was the ship that upon which Optimus Prime and the others traveled to Earth. He was actually a sentient being, but was so mentally devastated by the war that he willing chose to be put into coma so as not to have to deal with the horrors of the on-going conflict. This is most tragic when you realize that Omega Supreme is almost always obscenely powerful, to the tune of being the commander of the elite Omega Guardian robots (at least in the original series). This juxtaposition of unbridled power and unhealing wounds, especially mental and emotional wounds, has only helped to add to this character's enduring appeal.

Outside the mythos of the Transformers, the original Omega Supreme toy is one of the most sought-after because it's almost impossible to find in completion. Made up of a billion-gazillion tiny pieces, almost all of which were integral for the robot's integrity, most of the toys live on as half-completed forms that can't fully transform. Fortunately, when it was announced that there would be a new Omega Supreme toy for the Transformers Cybertron line, fans were understandably psyche.

　

Appearance – 4 out of 5

This is a well-made toy that looks not only like the Transformers Cybertron incarnation (upon which it is based), but also harkons back to the original character from the Generation One series. This makes the toy very appealing to fans of Cybertron, the original series, or just the franchise in general. There's visually quite a lot going on with this toy, but it works together into a very harmonious display, with the colors and textures balancing rather than clashing. It would have scored higher except that for a toy this size, a bit more variety and depth of texture would have been nice to see.

Construction – 5 out of 5

This is a very rugged and sturdy toy that is damn-near impossible to break. Every facet of the toy that moves is designed to disengage and snap back into place rather than break irrepairably. The toy has a dozen subtle moving parts, some of which move in tandem and they all work beautifully. A grat example is the trio of turrets on the left shoulder and arm of the toy. The turret on the arm never fails to sync up with the turrets on the shoulder when the toy is in vehicle mode, a level of care and forethought that is almost unprecedented.

Movement – 5 out of 5

The toy is extremly mobile with lots of joints and posing potential.

Extras – 2 out of 5

The toy comes with two missiles that load into a missile launcher (on the left shoulder) and a figure that becomes the head. Unfortunately, that is all. There are no additional features, no added weapons or bonus options, nothing. Given the character's tremendous size and power in the narrative, this isn't too unbecoming, but it still would have been nice to have a few additional clip-on features or something.

Packaging – 4 out of 5

The packaging is pretty standard for Hasbro, which means it's above-average for the toy industry. There's an ID card that can be cut out that gives stats and a character overview, a crash course in the series story, depictions of the toy in robot and vehicle mode, and a clear plastic view of the toy itself. Nothing too remarkable, but everything done and done well.

Overall – 4 out of 5

I'm almost ready to give this toy a Five rating, but the lack of a meaningful vehicle form is what held it back. The toy transforms into two trains that can link into one super-train that, while cool, don't really do anything. There are no features in the vehicle form that aren't available in the robot form, which means that few people will be inclined to transform the robot. This is probably for the best as the transformation process is exceptionally simple and not compelling at all. Odds are, you'll simply leave this toy in robot form, which kind of defeats the purpose of it being a Transformer. But other wise, that's perfectly fine because the robot form is frickin' awesome.

War Machine

War Machine

The Return of the Simply Awesome

Hasbro Iron Man 2 Toy Line, 2009

Like many people, I loved the Iron Man movies. As a comic book fan, I have to confess a general ambivalence to Tony Stark and his alter-ego as ole Shell Head, but the movies definitely showed me a side of the character that I wasn’t familiar with. I think that speaks volumes as to just how successful the movies were, that not only were the entertaining and fun, but they enticed a casual-yet-established comic book fan into going back and reading up on this classic character.

Background

War Machine is the player 2 of the Iron Man universe. Originally a combat suit of armor Tony Stark built for himself, he handed it off to his cohort and friend James Rhodes (in Iron Man 2, Rhodes uses the Mark II Iron Man armor to knock some sense into Tony and then refashions it with the help of the US military). War Machine/Rhody isn’t exactly a sidekick to Iron Man, at least not in the classic Robin-to-Batman sort of way. Rhody is a well-developed character who is more Stark’s friend and even partner than merely his lackey.

Iron Man storyline aside, its worth noting that the Marvel Comics toy department has a long and established history with action figures, going back into the 70s. It wasn’t until the Secret Wars figures in the 80s came along that they began to establish themselves as something unique from the common fare. Each iteration of the Marvel toys has gotten better and better (with only a few stumbles along the way) and has generally been at or near the cutting edge of action figures. The Iron Man 2 characters are a fantastic example of this with figures that are mobile, sturdy, and worth the very reasonable asking price.

Appearance – 4 out of 5

This is a lovely toy, no two ways about it. It’s beautifully detailed, well-sculpted, and is visually engaging without being overly busy. The toy very effectively captures the character from the movie, while also staying true to the concepts from the comic book. About the only way you could make the toy more visually appealing would be to make it out of metal or if they eyes glowed, but even then, that would only do so much to elevate this fantastic-looking figure.

Construction – 4 out of 5

War Machine, like the other figures in the line, is made of a sturdy plastic (especially for a 5-inch figure). The joints feel very solid and the figure itself is well-balanced so as to strike a near-mythical balance between durability and playability.

Movement – 3 out of 5

I wanted to give War Machine a Four here, but there are a few tiny problems with this otherwise fantastically mobile figure. For starters, the shoulder armor inhibits arm movement. This isn’t too big of a deal as the armor pieces lift up, but it is a bit strange. Also, the hip joints are quite bizarre, being not quite ball joints. While the legs re still perfectly mobile for most uses, don’t expect to position War Machine doing any high kicks without expending some effort.

Extras – 4 out of 5

War Machine doesn’t come with much, but does come with a fairly standard fare. He comes with a standing platform, two ‘special effects’ attachments for his guns (which are mobile on his back), and three cards that fit into the stand.

Now, I have to say a little bit about the cards. Two of the cards are transparent, with each of the three showing parts of the War Machine figure. It’s only when all three are laid down on top of one another that you can clearly see the whole figure. This. Is. Awesome. Can you imagine mixing and matching different sets of cards, just to see what the different armors would look like? I appreciate that this isn’t a tangible extra like an additional gun that can clip on or whatever, but this is still really cool! And it’s because of this innovative extra that the score is bumped up to Four.

Packaging – 3 out of 5

I really like the packaging of this toy, but it’s nothing out-of-this-world. The plastic wrap shows you the figure and the name and numbers on the front give you an idea of how to tell which is which. On the back is an individualized picture and write-up on the figure that is both a story summary and an outline for just who this character is. There are also a few other toys, just to whet your appetite for what other fan there is to be had in the line.

　

Overall – 5 out of 5

I’m going to be honest, I wasn’t expecting this toy to be THAT cool, but after opening the package and playing with the toy, I have to say that it really is just a lot of fun. The toy is well-made, very engaging both visually and tactilely and can be posed a million different ways. The toy is just fun to play with, and with a whole line of these figures, along with the pretty reasonable asking price (I paid under seven dollars for mine), and the innovative cards, and this toy really is the kind of thing many of us love to play with.

Halo Armor Pack

Missed It By That Much

McFarlane Toys, 2009

I figure we’ve spent enough time in the past, so this week, I wanted to review a fairly recent toy. I saw the Halo toys at my local Target and they really piqued my curiosity. I’m not a big fan of McFarlane toys because, despite how impressive they look, they rarely are more than semi-mobile statues. You can’t really play with them, which to me defeats the purpose of a toy. Still these looked good and they appeared to be quite mobile so I decided to invest in a package and see what was up.

Background

Halo is a first-person shooter video game that’s available on computers and the assorted XBox consoles. The story revolves around an elite soldier called Master Chief trying to stop an alien race from destroying humanity. This is set against the backdrop of a Starship Troopers-esque military campaign (and I mean the book, not the movie) where everybody seems to have a somewhat different form of mechanized armor. The game itself was revered upon its release for the story, the music, and all the various elements coming together to create a really solid and wonderful gaming experience, one that would become the hallmark of the newest generation of gaming.

Appearance – 5 out of 5

Love ‘em or hate ‘em, you can’t deny that the boys and girls at McFarlane toys know how to make a good-look product. Their toys have become the standard by which – at the very least appearance-wise – all others are measured and this toy does not disappoint. It is a work of art, beautifully representing four different armor forms (as the armor pack comes with a base figure and several different heads, shoulder guards, and chest plates which can all be switched out). There’s a lot going on visually with these toys and the details are perfectly done. There’s great texture and while the paint job isn’t completely flawless, it is still beautiful. And even where the tiniest bit of paint goes outside the line, it only seems to accentuate the figure’s look and appeal.

Construction – 2 out of 5

And this is where an otherwise fantastic toy begins to fall apart…literally. The action figure is made from some pretty cheap plastic. Not only is the toy very light in the hand but the plastic breaks incredibly easily. After playing with the figure for only about five minutes after opening the box, one of the guns had broken as had a shoulder joint (the reason for the goofy posture of the figure in the picture is because the left arm would fall off in any other orientation). This is especially bad for the heads because they have to be yanked off the neck joint with some none-too-trivial effort and the new head has to be rammed into place, pretty much spelling the death of the toy sooner rather than later.

Movement – 4 out of 5

My chief complaint with McFarlane toys definitely got blown out of the water by this figure. There is an array of joints (closing in on 30) that give this figure an incredibly wide range of posing possibilities. Some of the joints don’t move very intuitively (I’m looking at you, hip joints), but all in all, this is an absolutely incredibly possible figure that can take just about any posture you want.

Extras – 4 out of 5

Being a pack, this figure comes with three additional sets of shoulder armor, chest plate, and helmet/head (representing different armors from the game). It also comes with four guns and a grenade, making this one guy an assault force right out of the pack.

Packaging – 3 out of 5

The packaging excels in some areas and disappoints in others. The lack of any kind of explanation as to the story or who the characters (or, in this case, the different armor types) is really a loss. I’m pretty into video games and military hardware and I’m not too sure I could guess as to what CQB or ODST armors are supposed to be. At the same time, it is nice that the box is open and spacious, giving the customer a clear view of what all comes in the box. On the back is a display of other figures in the line, though it’s not complete by any stretch.

For those familiar with the machinima series Red vs Blue, you’ll probably check out these figures in the hopes of finding some Sarge, Grif, or other characters from the series. Sadly, without some paint and some patience, that won’t be happening. But what is really cool and worth taking note of is that those responsible for these toys knew where their bread was buttered and specifically had a double-pack on the back called the ‘Red vs Blue Team Slayer Pack’. Likewise, that the two figures shown on the back are in red and blue armor is not lost on this nerd.

　

Overall – 3 out of 5

This would be a damn fine – nay, legendary – toy if it was just a little bit more rugged. A lot of shortcomings can be overlooked for a toy this mobile and looks this nice. But given how quickly the accessories and the figure itself started to break, and how fragile aspects of the toy feel (I hate switching out helmets because I know it’s only a matter of very short time before one of them breaks), this toy really disappoints. If you have an action figure that you’re afraid to pick up and play with for fear that it will break in your grip, the entire experience is undermined. I wish for all the world to give this toy a four or even a five, but the toy’s just too damn fragile.

Leader-1

The Plastic Man of Mecha Fandom

Bandai Go-Bots, 1983

Since I reviewed Cy-Kill last week, I thought I should finish out my review of the Go-Bot toys by taking a look at the leader of the good guys (‘the Guardians’), Leader-1. In doing so, I’ll be comparing a very different kind of toy which I think needs to be addressed right off the bat.

A lot of toy lines have multiple versions of the same figure. For as much as we all love Hasbro, they all but invented the repaint-&-reissue trick to get consumers to buy essentially the same toy nine gazillion times. What the Go-Bots did differently was they made two versions of the same character; a large six-inch version (like the Cy-Kill figure reviewed last week) and a smaller three-inch version (like this week’s review of Leader-1). The fact that the figures transformed pretty much identically and they were dead-ringers for one another was really pretty brilliant and it’s a tactic that a lot of toy companies – Hasbro included – would later adopt.

Another element that’s worth noting is about the Go-Bots deviation from Transformers’ progression. As the Generation One Transformers line went along, more fantastic designs were incorporated (this is especially true after the 1986 movie). Vehicles looked less and less believable and reflected more and more the high science fiction the show had become. The Go-Bots went the opposite direction, with the vehicle modes looking more and more realistic. While I’m reviewing figures from the initial release, it is worth noting about the Go-Bots in general that as the toy line continued, the vehicle forms looked more and more realistic, to the point of being almost models of real vehicles. A friend of mine made a comparison between the two of being the Go-Bots were to the Transformers what Megadeth is to Metallica. Non-metal fans may not get that reference, but those familiar with the two bands may find that comparison to be shockingly astute.

Background

For those of you not familiar with Leader-1, he’s kind of the David Hasselhoff to Optimus Prime’s William Shatner (a watered-down, poor man’s version). He filled a very similar role as Prime, except he transformed into a fighter jet rather than a cargo truck. Leader-1 was depicted as a bit more aggressive and action hero-esque. Had the franchise survived, it might have been interesting to see how Leader-1 would have evolved in later incarnations.

Appearance – 4 out of 5

Except for the fact that Leader-1 has some weird pentagon for a mouth, this toy looks very much like the character from the cartoon. While it’s always nice to see the proportions and general appearance of a character preserved in the toy form, it’s especially remarkable – and thus praiseworthy – when it’s found on the smaller figures.

Construction – 4 out of 5

Just like Cy-Kill from last week, this figure is part metal and part plastic. The body itself is made of steel, while the joints and corresponding limbs are made of plastic. This makes a toy this small feel especially sturdy in one’s hand, while the weight distribution feels authentic (after all, were robots real, it’s likely their weight would be centered in their torsos).

Movement – 3 out of 5

I think giving this toy a rating of 3 in this category is being a bit generous, I keep reminding myself that this is a three-inch figure. Toys of this size and ilk are not known for their mobility to begin with. With the exception of movements related directly to transformation, the Leader-1 figure has shoulder joints that not only rotate, but allow for some limited later movement, giving the character some pretty decent arm mobility. Unfortunately, nothing else about the figure moves.

Extras – 1 out of 5

The figure comes with no extras, but this isn’t that abnormal given that it’s a three-inch figure.

Packaging – 2 out of 5

I scoured the Internet, trying to find a picture of the Leader-1 figure in the packaging so I could refresh my memory on what the packaging looked like, but alas I was unsuccessful. In the interest of fairness, I’m giving this the same default I afforded the Cy-Kill figure last week.

Overall – 3 out of 5

It may seem a little odd that Cy-Kill got a two, while Leader-1 got a three, but a six-inch figure needs to be held to higher standards then its three-inch counterpart. Many of the elements that made the Cy-Kill figure subpar made the Leader-1 figure stand out. It’s kind of like how you expect more from a movie in theaters than you do from a movie on television. The three-inch Go-Bot figures were simply better toys because their attributes were befitting their size and role as toys, whereas the six-inch figures quite simply needed to up their game.

Cy-Kill

The Black Sheep of the Mecha Family

Tonka Challenge of the Go-Bots Line, 1983

It’s a pretty simple equation that if one thing is popular, a lot of it should be even more popular. After all, look at all the games in the wake of Pokemon, vampire books in the wake of Anne Rice and now Stephanie Meyer. The list goes on and on and on. And such was the case in the 80s with Transformers and the cheap knock-off, Go-Bots.

Background

There’s not a lot that can be said about the Go-Bots, except that they were such a blatant rip-off of Transformers, its little wonder that they didn’t last. Moreover, they weren’t even that good of a rip-off. MASK was kind of a rip-off of GI Joe, but a good one. Inhumanoids was a rip-off of…well, I don’t know. HP Lovecraft and Centurians maybe? But Go-Bots was the gas station boxed wine to Transformers’ Crystal. There just wasn’t much a competition.

A few characteristics of the story do still standout, however, one of which was their bad guys’ leader Cy-kill. I’m pretty sure there were others, but like Leader-One (the leader of the good Go-Bots), he’s about all anybody remembers. So, seeing as how I reviewed Starscream last week and that was the third Transformers review, I figured it was time to give these guys a shout-out.

Appearance – 3 out of 5

Cy-kill looks very much like he did in the cartoon, with the exception of the menacing scowl (here replaced with a vacant generic robotic look). Otherwise, the proportions are very well preserved and the character looks like he did in the show.

Construction – 4 out of 5

Somewhat similar to other die-cast mecha toys, this one is part metal and part plastic. However, unlike some of the Transformers, the joints and limbs are plastic whereas the main body is metal. This makes the toy feel a little better balanced and sturdier. There’s a pretty admirable amount of texture included in both the plastic and metal parts and some details (such as the machinery-looking details inside the main headlight) that really stand out.

Movement – 2 out of 5

The die-cast trunk pretty much seals the fate of any joints on the body (there’s no waist or neck joints, so you can forget about turning Cy-kill’s head). There are simple joints for the shoulders, hips, and knees, but with the exception of the shoulders, these provide only enough mobility to allow for the transformation process. This translates into a bare-minimum amount of motion for an action figure.

Extras – 1 out of 5

Zip, zero, nilch, nada. This toy comes with no weapons, add-ons, side-cars riders, nothing.

Packaging – 2 out of 5

I can’t score the packaging effectively because, quite simply, I can’t remember what it looked like. Considering that I can vividly remember subtle details about just about every toy I’ve ever owned – including the packaging – that leads me to believe the packaging was less than remarkable. I recall the packaging for other Go-Bots figures and recall it being stark, hand-drawn imagery keeping with the cyberpunk-esque era of art that was popular in sci-fi in the early to mid-80s. Giving this toy the benefit of the doubt (and because I need to give it a score), I’m defaulting to below-average but not awful score of 2.

　

Overall – 2 out of 5

This is a very sturdy toy that does represent the character that inspired it, but unfortunately that’s all it has going for it. The lack of meaningful mobility and utter absence of any kind of extras really keeps this as sort of a sub-par figure. The toy has little personality (and certainly nothing that would indicate the character from the show) and it isn’t even clear (his name aside) if he’s a good guy or a bad guy. This review may seem kind of half-assed, but in my opinion that reflects the spirit of this toy line that will forever be remembered (and rightfully so) as the ugly and nerdy cousin of Transformers that nobody wants to talk about.